2012: 2-disc Blu-Ray (Columbia, 2009) Sony Home Entertainment

I am still trying to deduce Sony’s executive logic behind releasing a movie entitled 2012, in the year 2009. Channeling divine clairvoyance, maybe? Make sure all the tickets are sold before the actual apocalypse wipes out the theaters? Cynic, that I am. Hollywood has had a long-established love affair with the disaster epic. Nothing seems to impress the human animal more than mass devastation, particularly, when inflicted upon our own species. In the wake of the Chinese Coronavirus…well, maybe, not so much. I have long held to the belief Hollywood fluff gives far too much away to a lot of loose cannons, getting some terrible ideas on how to do some serious damage to the human race. But director, Roland Emmerich has made a veritable cottage industry bringing about the end of the world again and again…and – again, and then some. 2012 is not the ‘feel good’ summer blockbuster you will want to revisit more than once – if that, despite its depiction of the fateful few – including, of course, all of our central protagonists – having survived a world-wide tsunami aboard their space-age cruise ship. But we sincerely must give Emmerich his due here. He is a master at this sort of hellacious Armageddon, and 2012 is, perhaps, his opus magnum of the ‘natural disaster’ ilk; the sight of Yellowstone’s super volcano kick-starting the liquification of the entire west coast, and, the superior SFX brought about by a small army of brilliant technicians (too many to list herein, but thank you, fellas), lensed by cinematographer, Dean Semler. Well, it all comes crashing down in a Biblical-themed gnashing of teeth, fire and flood – just the sort of ‘end of times’ scenario to make the heart pound inside a darkened, air-cooled theater.

I cannot deny it. 2012 is an exhilarating, arguably – overwhelming – experience. The global cataclysm, grafted onto an otherwise threadbare plot stitched together by Emmerich and Harald Kloser, with an ensemble we care not two hoots about, scurrying like mice in all directions as civilization implodes around them, has long been predicted by the Mayan calendar. But see here and whoops! – they got the date wrong! The explanation for this catastrophic bereavement for Mother Earth – this time, at least – is the result of a solar storm, to have generated enough radiation to affect the meltdown of the earth's core, thereby triggering an utter collapse of its tectonic plates. Mass earthquakes and tsunamis ensue, wiping out ¾ of the world's population and land mass. As Emmerich cannot simply put on a visual effects show, connective tissue of the dialogue-driven variety is supplied by the marvelous John Cusack as Jackson Curtis, a one time, not terribly successful author who is determined to save his family from certain death. This includes his estranged wife, Kate (Amanda Peet), son Noah (Liam James) and daughter, Lily (Morgan Lily). The day begins like any other until Jackson, who moonlights as a chauffeur, inadvertently learns from his employer, Yuri Karpov (Zlatko Buric) that the end of times is imminent.

Meanwhile, U.S. geologist, Dr. Adrian Helmsley (Chiwetel Ejiofor – and no, I can’t pronounce it either) has been diligently working with a worldwide geophysical team on a timeline leading up to the end of days. This will hopefully ensure at least part of the human population is saved from total annihilation. Adrian warns U.S. President Thomas Wilson (Danny Glover) of the looming crisis and Wilson elects to put a plan of evacuation into action. He also chooses to stay behind with those doomed to extinction, sending his daughter, Laura (Thandie Newton) on to safety in his stead. Meanwhile, ‘end of times’ prognosticator and hippie loon, Charlie Frost (Woody Harrelson) is preparing for God’s big show, racing to Yellowstone for a front row seat at the super-volcano’s explosion, realizing it will be the last thing he sees.  And somewhere at sea, aged entertainers and life-long pals, Harry Helmsley (Blu Mankuma) and Tony Delgatto (George Segal) are preparing to put on another show for cruise line passengers – unsuspecting of the terrible fate that awaits on the open waters.

The rest of the movie really boils down to the briefest of interactions between various factions of this principal cast as they individually face their maker on their own terms. Jackson, together with his wife's new boyfriend, Dr. Gordon Silberman (Tom McCarthy) manages to fly the family to safety in a twin-engine after the entire Californian coast breaks apart, writhing into the ocean. Escaping to Vegas, Jackson and his family meet up with Yuri and his girlfriend, Tamara (Beatrice Rosen) - the group boarding Yuri's private plane, stockpiled with expensive cars and piloted by Tamara's true love, Sasha (Johann Urb). Intercontinental shift works in their favor after they prematurely run out of fuel. The plane crash lands in the Himalayan mountains with everyone except Sasha surviving. Now, these survivors make their pilgrimage to a secret bunker where Chinese workers have been constructing three massive arks to save selective groups of humanity for propagating the species once everything has settled down. Unhappy circumstance, when the elephantine tsunami strikes, it damages the ark’s watertight hydraulic door, affording Jackson his bit of shameless heroism to dive beneath the flood waters and save the day.

2012 is decidedly not a perfect entertainment and certainly, not Roland Emmerich's best work. Likely Emmerich will enter the annals of film history for Independence Day (1996). And while 2012 falls into virtually every trap associated with the summer blockbuster – cutesy kids in peril, the bookish and marginalized fellow who rises to the occasion and becomes a hero in the eyes of his estranged wife, pets who detect danger before their human counterparts, introducing oddball secondary characters merely to dispose of them along the way, etc. et al, a pretty solid entertainment it remains, glued together by spectacular special effects and a thunderous score from Harald Kloser and Thomas Wander. Better still, and overall, the acting in 2012 is more than competent, rescuing the picture from becoming just another effects-laden mishmash. John Cusack is a great actor. Even when given the most rudimentary scene, he adds something of value to give emotional depth to his character. Appearing as though he has not bathed in more than a decade, Woody Harrelson does crazy proud as Charlie Frost - the fringe/kook ham radio broadcaster, who celebrates the final moments of his own demise with an almost ecclesiastical joy.

One aspect of Emmerich's picture-making prowess I have always sincerely admired is his rejection of the jerky hand-held camera and chop-shop editing style that has otherwise become the norm to generate thrills. Here, Emmerich instead adopts an almost David Lean approach to his stylized destruction, holding on master shots – encompassing vistas of sublime devastation that boggle the mind and fill every corner of the Panavision frame. He paints in scenes of terror, but so beautifully composited, with a combination of models, live-action and CGI digital imagery, one could easily pause almost any scene in 2012 and have a perfect illustration, suitable for framing in an art gallery. Whatever its narrative flaws, 2012 at least looks the part of an epic saga – humanity in peril, yet, true to Emmerich’s hopefulness, destined to survive after more than a handful of nail-biting twists and turns. If it were ours to bestow, we would give Emmerich the Irwin Allen award for excellence here.

Sony Home Entertainment's Blu-Ray disc delivers a superb visual presentation. The image retains its stylized color palette with steely gray blues, warm reds and sun-burnt oranges. Contrast is bang on. Digital effects are well-integrated into the live-action footage – no cut n’ paste CGI here. The most startling aspect is overall image clarity – so crisp, it seems to leap from the screen. A light smattering of grain looks indigenous to its source, the entire image given a smooth and satisfying characteristic that is lush. The audio is 5.1 DTS, delivering an aggressive sonic experience that really rocks with deep base resonance. Accompanying the movie is an audio commentary from Emmerich and Kloser. Unfortunately, uninspired actually, with a lot of dead air between them. We also get a Picture-in-Picture video track that plays in a box atop the movie with many cast reflecting on the making of the movie. Finally, there is also an alternate ending. Sony has also afforded us a separate Blu-ray of goodies: an Interactive Mayan Calendar, nearly a half-hour of deconstructing the SFX, barely 9 mins. homage to Emmerich, 13 mins. examining the ‘science’ behind the end of the world, and nearly a half-hour critical examination of the Mayan calendar, the importance of the year 2012. Almost 5 mins. of deleted scenes follow, along with Adam Lambert’s music video, ‘Time for Miracles’ and a brief featurette on the music video. Last, Sony has given us access to a digital copy of the movie for download. Bottom line: if apocalyptic visions of tomorrow are your thing, and despite the fact we have survived and surpassed the expiration date when everything was supposed to go to hell, 2012 is a fine, fun finale to mankind’s reign on earth. Not a bad way to kill 2-hours.

FILM RATING (out of 5- 5 being the best)

3.5

VIDEO/AUDIO

5+

EXTRAS

3.5