A LITTLE ROMANCE: Blu-ray (Orion Pictures, 1979) Warner Archive

Cumbersome and inexorably loaded with saccharine to put even the die-hard romantic into a diabetic coma, director, George Roy Hill’s A Little Romance (1979) is a thoroughly misguided tale of prepubescent moppets, stricken with a terminal case of inescapable puppy love. As fantasy love stories go, this one is a dulcet doozy. Despite his star-billing, Sir Laurence Olivier, cast as the aged pickpocket, Julius Edmund Santorin, has very little to do except act as the deus ex machina for pint-sized and precocious American tourist, Lauren King (Diane Lane) and her street-savvy Parisian suitor, Daniel Michon (the dough-faced/curly-haired Thelonious Bernard). I suspect director Hill was going for the warm and fuzzy ‘feel good’ here, aiming to enchant us by setting this thimble-premised fluff in two of the most amour-inducing cities in the world – Paris and Venice. The picture makes several references to Shakespeare’s eternal lovers, Romeo and Juliet and even makes a pitstop in old Verona. Alas, this isn’t the story of a pair of star-crossed innocents, exploring their own burgeoning ardor, but a very contrived yarn to pitting movie kids against the will of even more frazzled and ferocious adults in charge of their welfare.  And thus, enters Olivier’s dotty – rather than delightful – con artist, spinning a legend about the Bridge of Sighs in Venice, where lovers who kiss beneath its stone façade at sundown, and in a gondola no less, while the bells toll in St. Mark’s Square, are destined to remain eternally bound to one another.

It should go without saying, Sir Laurence Olivier is a supremely fine actor whose last act finales in the picture-making biz were anything but worthy of his participation. A Little Romance catches Olivier on the downswing; too coy and contrived to be taken seriously, and too ambitiously the ham to transform this old coot into a memorable – even lovably carefree codger. Olivier’s entrance in A Little Romance, felled by an errant soccer ball hurled at his chest in the Bois de Boulogne, portends to the topsy-turvy turgidity of his winded and winding performance. Julius’ stories, with which he never fails to regale a captive audience, are dull rather than delicious; Olivier, desperately reaching for the mid-range bowers of comedic genius, but more often forced to scrounge for its castoff chestnuts instead. Yet, even these are rank, as in the scene where Julius skillfully picks the pockets of American tourists, Bob (Andrew Duncan), and Janet Duryea (Claudette Sutherland), then, with magnanimous charm, offers to pay for their dinner with their francs.

A Little Romance places Lauren and Daniel’s unlikely attraction in imminent peril. Daniel’s boozin’ taxi driver/papa, Michel (Claude Brosset) is the fairly unsympathetic sort. While Lauren’s mother, Kay (Sally Kellerman) is a devastatingly shallow and perversely fickle tart. Though the screenplay by George Roy Hill and Allan Burns, cobbled together from Patrick Cauvin’s E=mc2 Mon Amour, never veers into any concrete illustrations of Michel smacking Daniel around, and Kay’s resentment of her husband, Richard’s (Arthur Hill) decision to return the family to the United States, recognizing how it would only benefit Lauren, speaks volumes as to her merits as a mother (or lack thereof), A Little Romance presents the children as more mature than their parental influences, and, mildly discontented with their own lot in life. Indeed, Daniel spends his afternoons daydreaming at the cinema; his real/reel role models – Robert Redford and Humphrey Bogart.  Meanwhile, Lauren buries her head in books on existentialism to endure her flighty mother’s infatuation with C-grade American movie director, George De Marco (David Dukes); presumably, Kay’s latest stud du jour. After all, Richard is number three on Kay’s hit parade of failed relationships. Nevertheless, he is more a father to Lauren, sincerely doting on the girl as if she were his own daughter. Moreover, after De Marco crudely inquiries whether Daniel has ‘scored’ with Lauren in her bedroom, and is given a swift sucker punch to the gut for his query, Daniel’s staunch defense of Lauren’s honor ingratiates him to Richard immediately. Alas, from this moment on, Kay forbids her daughter to have anything to do with Daniel.

And so, their clandestine meetings begin. Daniel and his friend, street-savvy Londet (Graham Fletcher-Cook) whose uncle owns a theater in the ‘red light district’, expose Lauren and her ditzy cohort, Natalie (Ashby Semple) to all sorts of misadventures; the pitfalls of drink and sneaking into a ‘dirty movie’ – a discovery that shocks Lauren into tears, only to be comforted by Daniel, who promises her that real love is not about the sex. I sincerely have issues with Daniel – a kid, much too mature for his years. Granted, he is French and, furthermore, has had to grow up quickly in the squalid flat where not even the adult entrusted with his care behaves as any parent ought.  And so, Daniel has become rather adept at garden variety petty larcenies the rest of us are supposed to find charming; able to sneak in and out of movie houses without paying for the privilege, defying adult authority, and pursuing the girl of his desires on his own terms, despite seemingly insurmountable odds. Having said all that, Daniel is still a boy. And so, petty jealousy rears its ugly – and mostly unwarranted – head. His mistrust of Julius, simply because Lauren finds him fascinating, speaks to a level of immaturity that is, I think, supposed to endear us to Daniel’s Achilles’ heel. After all, he is only a guy in love with a girl who can never truly be his.  

A Little Romance was Orion Pictures first theatrical release and it desires to take dead aim at an implausible glossy and globe-trotting yarn, usually ascribed and confined to more adult fare. Alas, the guile and innocence of our diminutive lovers is fairly leaden and charm-free.  As the plot wears on and the roadblocks against Daniel and Lauren mount, we seem to care less and less about what happens to them as, predictably, the Hill/Burns’ screenplay finds ample ways of rescuing the pair from certain fate and always in the nick of time.  As example: to avoid being discovered by the authorities, Daniel, Julius and Lauren swipe three bicycles and enter the Tour de Verona. Precisely whose bikes they have stolen, why no one catches them in the act, and the police do not even make chase after unearthing the truth, remains a little too conveniently played out. Or, in the movie’s penultimate act of chivalry, Daniel bribes a gondolier with 12-lira to get them to the Bridge of Sighs before sunset, then shoves the gondolier overboard, taking control of the vessel after the gondolier refuses to commit to the already agreed upon destination. Alas, the comedy derived from these moments is less than spontaneous. Indeed, everything is too well rehearsed to elicit our impromptu exhilaration and cheers. Even the action set pieces, like Lauren and Daniel’s escape by train, or the aforementioned bicycle race out of Verona lack the necessary oomph.  Julius, is a puckish matchmaker, but as clueless as the kids on how best to bring about a satisfactory conclusion to their cross-continent journey. A Little Romance’s appeal is too broad-reaching to be effective. Clearly, George Roy Hill is aiming to make a children’s movie that will appeal to adults.  But he lacks the dead aim and adventuresome spirit to conquer what is essentially a very clumsy, and not altogether fulfilling knight’s errand.

Our story begins with parallel introductions to Lauren King, a bookish and affluent 13-year-old American, living in Paris with her mother and stepfather, and, Daniel Michon, a street-savvy 13-year-old French boy, well-versed, though two steps away from becoming an urchin.  Lauren and Daniel meet in the Château de Vaux-le-Vicomte where Kay is romantically pursuing George De Marco, the director of C-grade schlock curiously well-received in Europe, and where Daniel is taking a school trip. Sneaking into the backstage area to spy on the production, Daniel and Lauren exchange curious references to some of his favorite movies. Lauren, however, prefers novels to novelties. Nevertheless, the two quietly form an attachment, finding ways to hang out together. As Kay could not care less about her daughter’s welfare, even choosing to host a cast wrap party for George in lieu of a birthday party for her daughter, Lauren increasingly turns to her stepfather, Richard for moral support. Richard is sympathetic and takes a liking to Daniel, who stands up for what he believes and defends Lauren’s honor after George crudely suggests the girl is sexually ripe for the taking.

Inadvertently, Daniel and Lauren meet Julius Santorin, who presents himself as a quirky boulevardier. Daniel is unimpressed by Julius, who nevertheless manages to dazzle Lauren with stories of his life, regaling the couple with the tradition of kissing in a gondola beneath the Bridge of Sighs in Venice. The tale captivates Lauren who, thereafter, elects to put Daniel’s good use of horse racing to the test by encouraging him to place a bet with her saved up allowance money – enough to earn them the cost of travel from Paris to Italy to keep their date. Entrusting Julius with the monies, Lauren and Daniel are bitterly disappointed when, after an initial flourish of success, they lose virtually everything. Miraculously, Julius proclaims he did not be on the horse as requested by Daniel, but another that has since come in, thus affording them enough cash to board a train. Regrettably, Lauren tips off Natalie by phone as to her plans. These are regaled by Natalie to Kay who immediately orders Richard to bring Lauren and ‘that boy’ back to France. Meanwhile, our traveling trio are forced to jump from the moving train to avoid being discovered by the authorities. They later bribe American tourists, Bob and Janet Duryea to drive them to Venice. However, after stopping for the night in Verona, Julius puts his sticky fingers to good use, swiping Bob’s wallet; then, slyly offering to pay for their meals to throw Bob off his scent.

The ruse works until Bob discovers Lauren’s photo in the local gazette and a profile of Julius, alerting him to the fact he has been had. While Bob attempts to contact the local authorities, Julius helps Lauren and Daniel steal bicycles. Together, this triumvirate blends into a local race, whizzing past the police undetected. Alas, it is not long before Julius falls behind and collapses from exhaustion. He chides Lauren for lying to him about the motivations for their trip abroad. Earlier, Lauren suggested to Julius she was going to visit her sick mother in hospital. Now, Julius confesses to Lauren and Daniel that he completely fabricated his past. He had no wife, no memorable journeys through Europe, and no memories of kissing under the Bridge of Sighs in Venice – a tale, purely concocted out of thin air. A tearful Lauren confides she has been keeping secrets too. Kay and Richard intend to move the family back to Houston at summer’s end. Therefore, this will be her very last chance to ‘ensure’ her love for Daniel endures forever.  Newly committed to the journey, the Daniel, Julius and Lauren eventually arrive at St. Mark's Basilica. Unfortunately, they encounter the Duryeas again, leading to a chase through the winding streets. Julius separates from the children, encouraging them to go on while he distracts the police.  

Taken into custody, Julius is slapped around by Inspector Leclerc (Jacques Maury), but refuses to divulge Lauren and Daniel's whereabouts. Richard arrives and learns of Lauren’s purpose for making the journey. Meanwhile, Lauren and Daniel bribe a gondolier to take them to the Bridge of Sighs. While the gondolier agrees to a reduced rate, he stops short of taking the couple to the Bridge, cruelly suggesting they can see it from where they currently sit. Instead, Daniel throws the gondolier overboard and hurries the vessel to the last length of their journey. Having accomplished their goal – to kiss at sunset beneath the bridge while the bells toll – Daniel and Lauren are returned to France. On her last day in Paris, Lauren tearfully bids Daniel and Julius farewell, much to Kay’s chagrin. Daniel and Lauren pledge not to become ‘like everybody else.’ As the family’s car pulls away for the last time, Lauren watches in the rear view as Daniel races on foot behind them, leaping and waving goodbye.

A Little Romance is a maudlin affair. George Roy Hill wrings his tears from too many contrived incidents to be truly memorable. The picture, while hopeful in its final reel, is thoroughly self-indulgent for most of its run time.  Georges Delerue’s tranquil score, with a bright and bouncy central theme was justly Oscar-nominated, and, Pierre-William Glenn’s cinematography makes the most of the sublime natural, and stately splendors to be had from France to Italy. Indeed, the picture is part travelogue. Mercifully, these ideal settings help to dilute the treacle on tap elsewhere. This permeates the picture with a decidedly shallow thud. It is a little hard to invest in Daniel and Lauren’s grand amour. After all, they are only thirteen. And the jarring realization in the final reel, that these adolescent ‘lovers’ will likely never lay eyes on each other again – much less, hands, hearts and souls – is neither sobering nor poignant. In lieu of any genuine emotion, Hill’s movie aims for the artifice of an imperfect love – thinly outlined, briefly endeavored, but ultimately doomed to failure.

A Little Romance arrives on Blu-ray via the Warner Archive (WAC) in a sparkling 1080p transfer that will surely please. The anamorphic Panavision image delivers is solid with refined colors and a gorgeous amount of film grain looking very indigenous to its source. Contrast is superb and fine details abound. Age-related artifacts have been eradicated. This is a very nice-looking disc of only a so-so movie.  The audio is 2.0 mono and adequate for this presentation. Occasionally, it possesses a muffled characteristic. Dubs are painfully obvious. But these are shortcoming inherent in the original sound mix, not the remastering efforts put forth herein. These are stellar and commendable. There are NO extras. Bottom line: A Little Romance is a more than a little light on reflection. It’s not a very good movie, but a minor programmer in which Olivier’s formidable talents are all but squandered in service to a tale of two kiddies on a lark and a spree. You could easily pass on this one and be very glad that you did!

FILM RATING (out of 5 – 5 being the best)

2.5

VIDEO/AUDIO

4.5

EXTRAS

0