ROAD TO MOROCCO: Blu-ray (Paramount, 1942) Kino Lorber

Changing up directors, Bing Crosby and Bob Hope hit their stride in director, David Butler’s Road to Morocco (1942) – generally acknowledged as the brightest installment in Paramount Picture’s ‘Road’ franchise, and, the third such outing in as many years to serve as a showcase for the comedic styling of Crosby, Hope and Dorothy Lamour, with Anthony Quinn making a welcomed return as ‘the dastardly foil’ – in this case, Mullay Kasim. I wouldn’t necessarily say Road to Morocco is any better than the rest of the ‘Road’ pictures. It does, however, contain one of the catchiest title tunes in movie history, penned by Jimmy Van Heusen and Johnny Burke, effectively warbled by Hope and Crosby aboard a camel, trekking across an obvious rear-projection desert landscape.  The tune, infectious and bouncy was later re-recorded for Decca by the boys and became wildly popular on the hit parade, and for good reason. Who can debate lyrics like “We're off on the road to Morocco. Where they're going, why we're going, how can we be sure…I'll lay you eight to five that we'll meet Dorothy Lamour!” or, “I hear this country's where they do the dance of the seven veils. We'd tell you more, but we would have the censor on our tails,” and finally, “For any villains we may meet, we haven't any fears. Paramount will protect us, 'cuz we’re signed up for five more years!” Interestingly, this last bit was altered for the Decca single. A word about that camel the boys ride during this sequence; uncooperative, as it was, spitting in Hope’s kisser right in the middle of the scene, causing Crosby to ad lib a line and crack an impromptu grin. The moment was so genuine, Butler left it in the picture. He also allowed the boys to get away with so much off-the-cuff banter, co-star Dorothy Lamour was left frequently perplexed and uncertain when to interject her lines of actual ‘scripted’ dialogue.  For exoticism, the production stayed fairly close to home, Yuma, Arizona subbing in for the Sahara and the studio back lot pretty much filling in for everything else; a skillful amalgam of free-standing sets, sound stage interiors and clever matte process to extend the Arabian nights fantasy landscape into seeming infinity.

Road to Morocco is the first of the ‘Road’ movies not to be based on an existing story, and the looseness in Frank Butler and Don Hartman’s co-authored screenplay fits the franchise to a tee. Once again, it’s not about the plot, rather, situations built around a gag or two, allowing for more – a lot more – of the Crosby/Hope magic. You just have to love a movie so loaded with barbs and inside jokes that it keeps you guessing in anticipation of the next line. One of the most hilarious, Hope – in drag – reappearing as his departed ‘Aunt Lucy’ to goad, instruct and keep the boys on the straight and narrow. Just a sampling: Hope’s Orville ‘Turkey’ Jackson begins, “Aunt Lucy. I can see her now, lying on her dying bed, looking at you with those big, trusting eyes. 'Before I go, Jeff, promise me one thing,' she said. 'Promise me you'll always be a friend to little Orville,' she said. 'No matter what happens, you'll never leave the little jerk,' she said. 'Promise me, Jeff, promise me,' she said,” to which Crosby’s Jeff Peters deadpan interjects, “Yeah, then she up and died before I had the chance to say no.” Jackson cringes. “I hope she didn't hear that. The dead have a way of coming back you know.” “Get out,” Crosby’s Jeff Peters replies, “When they're dead, they're dead.” “Not Aunt Lucy,”, Turkey suggests, “She was a Republican!”

Road to Morocco opens with a bang – literally; a mysterious explosion and sinking of a freighter at sea. According to the world-wide news reports, all except two castaways were saved from the wreckage. We cut to a clumsily-hewn raft; Orville and Jeff aimlessly adrift. It seems Orville went down into the cargo hold for a quick smoke, unaware he was surrounded by gun powder. Whoops! Before long, Jeff begins to surmise they have only a few days before insanity takes over and one of them will have to cannibalize the other in order to survive. Jeff flips a coin, then thanks Orville for his sacrifice. Mercifully, the boys spot land shortly thereafter and swim ashore. The sight of Crosby carrying Hope from the roiling surf across a sandy threshold is pretty funny.  Taking refuge by a bush, Orville reminisces about his dearly departed Aunt Lucy, who bears an uncanny likeness to him. While the boys contemplate their next move, they are assaulted by a camel who, at first, licks each of their cheeks when the other is not looking, then spontaneously spits in Orville’s face as Jeff attempts to mount the animal for their trek across the dunes.

Arriving at an exotic port city, the boys are confused when an outwardly ‘mad’ patron is afforded the right to take whatever food stuffs he requires from the sellers in the market place without paying for it. One of the sellers explains how Allah has taken away the man’s reason. As such, he is a ‘beloved’ and must be looked after. This leads Jeff to concoct a plan. Orville can play the part of the village idiot to procure them a hearty meal. The ruse backfires when the seller they approach is as stiflingly simple, and, smacks Orville on the noggin with a tin pot for attempting to flimflam him out of his hard-earned goods. Next, Orville encounters a processional; bare-chested bearers, carrying a covered throne from which a supple female hand emerges, tempting Orville. Now, the boys have their first encounter with the ruthless Sheik, Mullay Kasim and his marauding bandits, who shoot up the market place as they race to their destination. Orville and Jeff take refuge in a café. Jeff orders them a veritable banquet of earthly delights, knowing they are unable to pay for the meal. In the middle of their feast, one of the bearers (Dan Seymour) coaxes Jeff from the table. At a distance, Orville observes as Jeff and the man appear to be bartering for something. The bearer pays a handsome sum to Jeff, who returns to the table and pays the waiter for their meal before informing Orville that he has sold him. To who, and for what purpose? This remains a mystery. As Jeff callously looks on, Orville is bound, hooded and carted off for parts unknown.

A week later, Jeff is troubled by a vision of Aunt Lucy.  She urges Jeff to go in search of Orville. Jeff agrees. He has done a bad thing, and promises Lucy’s spirit to faithfully be reunited with his best friend.  To lure Orville out, Jeff strolls through the city streets by moonlight, warbling his favorite song ‘Ain’t Got A Dime to My Name’.  Suddenly, Orville’s locket is tossed from a palace window with a cryptic note, presumably written in Orville’s hand. Orville’s note pleads for Jeff to save himself, as he is being tortured night and day and will never be free again. More determined than ever, Jeff is detoured in his search by a pretty voice, cooing yet another Van Heusen/Burke song, ‘Constantly’. Climbing a garden wall into the palace, Jeff stumbles – literally – upon the lavishly appointed bedroom of Princess Shalmar (Lamour), sweetly proclaiming her love for Orville, lying next to her on a gigantic pin-cushion.  Jeff barges in. Orville nervously tries to explain – he and Shalmar are engaged and will be wed in a few days. The stars have foretold it. What the stars have not managed to accurately pinpoint is that the Hyder Khan’s (Vladimir Sokoloff) telescope lens was dirty with fireflies at the time he misperceived his fortune-telling, as the planets, Jupiter and Venus.

Hence, the Khan’s initial prediction for the princess, that her first husband will meet with a terrible fate after only one week of marriage (allowing Shalmar to marry again to her real love, Mullay Kasim) is a falsehood. If she marries Orville, it will be for life! Learning of Shalmar’s plans to marry the infidel, Kasim’s fears are allayed by the Khan’s earlier prediction. But Kasim’s concerns are rejuvenated when the princess begins to find Jeff quite charming. Orville’s attempts to get rid of Jeff are for not, as Shalmar has invited him to stick around for their wedding. However, one of the princess’s servant girls, Mihirmah (Dona Drake), has become enamored with Orville too.  Learning of his ill-timed fate, Mihirmah tries to forewarn Orville of Shalmar’s true intentions. Meanwhile, in the regal gardens adjacent the palace, Jeff serenades the princess with the luscious love ballad, ‘Moonlight Becomes You’ – the tune, later to become a top-ten hit for Crosby. Learning the real reason behind his pending marriage, Orville feigns magnanimity, offering Jeff as Shalmar’s first husband. Still unaware the prophesy is untrue, Shalmar refuses to entertain the thought. Now, the Khan arrives to beg the princess for forgiveness. He has made a terrible mistake. She forgives him, but has already fallen passionately for Jeff, whom she wishes now to be her one and only lawfully wedded husband instead of Kasim.

Naturally, Kasim will not stand for any of this. He and his men storm the palace as Shalmar and the boys are plotting to make their quick getaway. Everyone is captured by Kasim and his men. While he takes the women, Kasim abandons Jeff and Orville in the middle of the desert. Surely, they will die. Delirious from the heat, the boys hallucinate a drive-in diner in the middle of the Sahara, and then, visions of Princess Shalmar. Miraculously, they discover a real oasis not far from Kasim’s camp. Again, Orville and Jeff fall prey to Kasim’s men, captured and brought to him.  Only now, the boys manage to find a rival sheik and his horsemen whom they help turn on Kasim’s camp, making their speedy retreat with Shalmar and Mihirmah. From this moment of abject chaos, we cut to a short while later; Orville, Jeff, Shalmar and Mihirmah aboard a freighter bound for New York. Regrettably, Orville has not learned his lesson. He ducks into the powder room for a quick cigarette. Again, he sets off the gun powder with his lit ashes; the vessel sinking with all on board. We cut to a raft, with Orville, Jeff, Shalmar and Mirhirmah piled atop its half-sunk wreckage. Just as they are about to get into a heated argument, everyone spots New York harbor on the horizon.  

Road to Morocco was the biggest smash yet in the popular ‘Road’ franchise, the number four money-maker of the year. Butler’s direction is pretty swift; the picture coming in at just under an hour-and-a-half – lined from ‘main’ to ‘end’ titles, with daft comedy and diverting slaphappy silliness. Particularly during the war years, such light-hearted nonsense served as a very genuine morale booster. Despite having transgressed to the other side of the rainbow in our more recent cinema tastes, Road to Morocco still clicks as it should – thanks to its razor-sharp banter and William C. Mellor’s highly romanticized cinematography. Make no mistake – this is an Arabian nights-styled adventure/comedy, supremely satisfying in all its political in-correctness.  Moreover, Hope and Crosby share a mutual admiration and confidence in their screen team partnership, so succinct and comfortable with each other, that to witness the sheer pleasure of their common company produces more than enough tantalizing enjoyment for the audience. The Heusen/Burke songs are all charming and instantly hummable. Perhaps, noted New York Times critic, Bosley Crowther stated it best, “Let us be thankful that Paramount is still blessed with Bing Crosby and Bob Hope, and that it has set its cameras to tailing these two irrepressible wags on another fantastic excursion!”

In 1996, Road to Morocco was selected for preservation by the Library of Congress as being “culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant.” So, it is rather disheartening to report that Kino Lorber’s new to Blu is cribbing from digital elements that are almost as old, borrowed from Universal’s sincerely flawed archival elements. Universal became the custodians of Paramount’s pre-1950’s library via an acquisition by MCA in the late 1960’s. What is here looks careworn and sloppy with weak contrast, some edge effects, and a lot of age-related dirt, scratches and debris scattered throughout, with one or two inserts made from a 35mm blow-up that is excessively grainy. While the Blu-ray is still watchable, it is hardly up to standard, and certainly, nowhere near representing the very best in hi-def. As Road to Morocco was also Oscar-nominated for Best Sound Recording, there is a lot of built-in distortion during the musical sequences, and this is more than a tad disheartening. Crosby’s warbling of ‘Ain’t Got a Dime…’ sounds as though it were recorded in an echo chamber with extra reverb added. Overall, this Blu-ray is disappointing; especially, as Kino has splurged for a new audio commentary from Jack Theakston, plus the same regurgitated ‘Bob Hope and the Road to Success’ featurette and adding a ‘Command Performance’ broadcast from 1945, along with ‘trailers from hell’ hosted by John Landis.  Extras are a nice touch, folks. But they do not make up for a flawed 1080p presentation. I would have had Kino do less add-ons and more with obtaining suitable remasters from Uni instead. Bottom line: highly recommended for content. Only so/so for the transfer quality. Judge and buy accordingly.

FILM RATING (out of 5 – 5 being the best)

4

VIDEO/AUDIO

2.5

EXTRAS

3.5