BAYWATCH Remastered: Complete Series Blu-ray (LBS/All American/Pearson, 1989-99) Fremantle VEI Home Entertainment

It isn’t often a TV series, initially judged as a commercial flop, ranked #73 out of a possible 105 programming options, and, canceled by its network, NBC after only one season, goes on to become one of the most internationally renowned and widely watched franchises in television history. Okay – never. Except in the case of Baywatch (1989-1999). To say Baywatch became a cultural phenomenon overnight is not overstating a point: that perky tits and firm asses trump substance and good writing every time. For 9 seasons and 2 reboots actually, Baywatch brought in its boatload of booty, easily to revive that 70’s ilk for jiggle TV sexploitation, adding sun, fun, surf and turf to its equal-opportunity sexism. And make no mistake about it. The show gave virtual unknown, Canadian Pamela Anderson a career, as well as a reputation (she was discovered by producers on a Jumbo-tron while attending a football game…the stuff that dreams, male fantasy wet dreams, and, big-breasted bimbettes are made of), and added luster and cache to David Hasselhoff’s European following (the guy is legendary in Germany – go figure), as well as to promote an ever-revolving roster of firm bodies with incidents to get them half-naked, soaking wet, and charging up and down the Malibu coastline in slo-mo. Baywatch today is one of those sinfully stupid pop-u-tainments one cannot help but watch – and actually, admire – much to the chagrin of base intellect, niggling in the background as a reminder, that despite its various ass-ets, this show really is pure crap.  Indeed, Hasselhoff was not pleased with the hiring of Anderson, believing her uber-svelte and curvaceous body would eventually become the focus of the show. Good call. It did. Baywatch’s entire modus operandi can be summed up in a single line: hot lifeguards of both sexes save people, get laid, save more people, get laid again…and again….and…well, you know. Occasionally, there is a quaintly diverting mystery to solve, or a mixer to show that these boys and girls are fighters as well as lovers. Lifeguarding: it’s a young man’s game, and a young woman’s every make-believe to slip into a lycra-fitted one piece and not let even an ounce of fat show. Keto it, girls. To this end, Baywatch employed ‘actors’ whose one essential was the body beautiful, wearing practically nothing.

For sexpots, in addition to Pamela Anderson’s fantastic/plastic inflatable babe, C.J. Parker, with the boobs and buttocks to offset her rather manly jaw, the show attempted to make an early blonde Venus out of actress, Erika Eleniak as the perpetually pouty, Shauni McClain. Playing the ‘intellectual’ hottie was Alexandra Paul as Stephanie Holden in a role expressly written after Paul’s auditions for C.J. or Summer Quinn (eventually filled out by Nicole Eggert) was turned down flat.  Paul’s streamlined and athletic build lacked the voluminous quality sought by producers. But her intelligence caught the eye of Hasselhoff, who suggested she might be written in as a love interest for his character. Meanwhile, raven-haired Jasmin Bleeth as sister, Caroline, came late to this party, decidedly lacking enough brain power to spin a whirligig, but bumped out in all the right places to sell her wares convincingly enough for the cameras. There were others, of course, if none to strike as indelible a chord as Anderson. As for the boys – beefcake was decidedly the order of the day, with Hasselhoff and co-star, and ex-Hardy Boy, Parker Stevenson (as Craig Pomeroy) outclassed by the stud-parade and hunk du jours ‘abs over acting’ class of rippling hot dummies, headlined in Season One by the uber-buff, John Allen Nelson (as John D. Cort), though, and, almost immediately, to be replaced by the more moon-doggy-ish, Billy Warlock (Eddie Cramer), and later, David Charvet (as Matt Brody, of the penetrating stare, meant to suggest deep thought), David Chokachi (as the perpetually bronzed, Cody Madison), and Michael Bergin (sleepy-eyed stud, J.D. Darius).

It’s rather difficult to assess a show like Baywatch – even on its own terms, as gratuitous mental floss to gum up the mind – in that it remains best remembered today for taking male and female pin-ups of its generation and, rather miraculously, elevating their one-dimensional status as eye-candy into a highly watchable/hour-long prime-time program about nothing except life at the beach.  The mileage creators, Michael Berk, Douglas Schwartz and Gregory J. Bonann achieved on this thimble head of a scenario is extraordinary. Yet, all of this lovable nonsense might have come to not. NBC was decidedly unimpressed, and actually pulled the plug on Baywatch after only one season. Rather bizarrely, fans wrote in a show of protest, and, despite its discounted status by the critics, Baywatch was revived, going on to become a stunner of a hit in the Nielsen’s, and a bonanza, pulling in an estimated 1.1 billion viewers worldwide on a weekly basis. When a show is this big, it easily becomes rife for parody – especially, when the thesis itself is truly laughable. And so, Baywatch has long-since endured the slings and arrows of being thought of a slickly packaged trash, effectively to lower the I.Q. while raising the hormonal levels of its audience into a sweaty froth. Yeow, and grab the surfboards!

For the first 9 years, Baywatch remained a California-based institution, celebrating that laissez faire escapist paradise in all its gawdy and tawdry, turbo-driven sex appeal. A seismic change in location, cast and crew resulted in the rebranded Baywatch: Hawaii (1999-2001) after Australia refused to grant the show’s producer’s permission to relocate there. Baywatch also spawned the even more insipid spin-off, Baywatch Nights (1995-97). The weekly diet of rescuing tourists from their own half-drunk/heat-stroked folly was rounded out by sexually charged storylines to inveigle the cast with one another, and, with the occasional added threat of an earthquake, gang violence, serial killer, and, a few well-timed shark attacks peppered in for good measure during the ratings sweeps. Exactly how this gets you through 11 Seasons as a #1 hit show, in hindsight, seems utterly absurd – more so when one considers not a single Season 1 cast member was to actually survive the whole run of the show. Hasselhoff’s Mitch Buchannon was the most covered throughout Baywatch’s lengthy tenure, appearing in a whopping 220 episodes, including the pilot, followed by Jeremy Jackson (playing his pubescent son, Hobie, named after surf and sailing entrepreneur/pioneer, Hobie Alter). Jackson grew up in 159 episodes. Then, there was Michael Newman (in 150 episodes all told, playing himself, an actual middle-aged lifeguard – the ‘real deal’, whose expertise assuaged other cast members of their fear of the water as well as performing some of their own stunts), and finally, the aforementioned Pamela Anderson, (whose hour-glass figure graced an impressive 111 episodes). The Hawaiian retool of Baywatch was short-lived, hastened into extinction by the exit of both Hasselhoff and Newman – the last remaining bloodlines from the L.A. era. Interestingly, Hasselhoff was not the first choice for Mitch – Tom Selleck, then freshly departed from his popular Magnum P.I. (1980-88) franchise, turning producers down as he was tired of being perceived as a ‘sex symbol’.

As a brief aside, it is interesting to re-consider David Hasselhoff’s participation in Baywatch. The one-time star and sex symbol of 80’s TV sensation, Knight Rider (1982-86), at 38 yrs. young in 1990, he nevertheless appeared somewhat over-the-hill for this testosterone-driven/chest-thumping freak show. Hasselhoff’s competition for the role of Mitch was none other than former Dukes of Hazzard (1979-85) star, Tom Wopat, The Greatest American Hero’s (1981-83) William Katt, Falcon Crest’s (1981-90) Lorenzo Lamas, Highlander’s (1992-98) Adrian Paul, and, bringing up the rear, Jack Scalia, who had yet to establish himself in a popular series, but had shown great promise – and a pretty pair of pecs besides – in the final season of NBC’s ratings’ bonanza Remington Steele (1982-87) as well as to go on to become a reoccurring love interest for Linda Grey’s Sue Ellen Ewing on the primetime soaper, Dallas (1978-91). But Hasselhoff had the Euro-cache to push him over the top; also, the still much-and-fondly-recalled status of playing up to the theatrical heroics in Knight Rider. And in retrospect, Hasselhoff’s presence is the one stabilizer that keeps the rest of Baywatch’s babes and brutes in check, toggling down their escapades a notch or two, to keep all that nuclear-powered/ego-driven energy from going completely off the rails into blindsided parody.

The decision to cancel Baywatch after only one season was not entirely NBC’s as the show’s production company, GTG, primarily a newsmagazine publisher, went out of business. With its extensive location work, Baywatch was one of the costliest shows to produce on television. Nevertheless, Hasselhoff and the show’s creators pressed on, reviving Baywatch in 1991 for the first-run syndication market. Interestingly, the show’s popularity soared overseas before it actually hit its stride in North America; the infectious cocktail of boobs, butts and tough bods cavorting about the sunny landscape proving a magic elixir, particularly in the European and Asian markets who continue to hold to the myth that everyone in North America is living this ‘good life’. Apparently, the never saw the E! True Hollywood Story episode in which co-star, Billy Warlock recalls how the ocean was so polluted with garbage and raw sewage, Baywatch actually employed a full-time medic to hose down the cast every time they came out of the water. Very glamorous, indeed! Even more fascinating, Baywatch’s core audience was female, appealing to women between the ages of 18 and 34. Speculation for this slanted demographic rests with the show’s depiction of women competing on equal footing with their buff male counterparts, performing acts of heroism usually, and almost exclusively ascribed to men. Will Rogers State Beach in Long Beach, as well as the sunny shores of Malibu played host to Baywatch in its prime, with interiors shot at the old Culver Studios. The other likely reason for the show’s popularity was its pop-tune infused soundtrack – a top-heavy assortment of then ‘cutting edge’ and breakout artists, whose heart-pounding riffs became the pulse of the program, usually featured in an endless barrage of carefully timed montages shot in slow motion and featuring various cast in all their jiggle, wiggle and chest and arm-flexing glory.  This concentration on pop tunes has created havoc for Baywatch ever since the show’s initial broadcast cycle ended. Thanks to exorbitant ASCAP fees to license all of this music, over the decades much of Baywatch’s soundtrack has been hacked apart, reassembled and/or foreshortened to conform to public domain standards.

The original NBC main title, ‘Save Me’ performed by Peter Cetera, Bonnie Raitt and Richard Sterban, belonging to Cetera's 1988 album, One More Story, became the first casualty, replaced with ‘Above the Waterline’ by Kim Carnes for the DVD releases, but also, ‘I’m Always Here’ performed by Survivor’s Jimi Jamison for Seasons 3-10, as well as Baywatch’s cable syndication. Also on DVD, Season 2’s opener became ‘Strong Enough’ performed by Evan Olson. Baywatch holds several dubious distinctions worth noting. First, and until Supernatural (2005-20), it was TV’s longest-running primetime drama never to win a single Emmy. Second, most of its cast were not swimmers. Indeed, Pamela Anderson went on record saying she ‘hated the water’. Interesting to consider too what the series might have been had producers gone with Party of Five’s Neve Campbell, who auditioned, alongside Alicia Silverstone, Teri Hatcher, and Denise Richards – none of whom were eventually hired. Part of Baywatch’s appeal is due its promotion of that sexy sizzle to extend to its sun-kissed shores and warm waters. But like everything else promoted in North American popular fiction, this too proved a myth, as California beaches can be unseasonably cold – even during the summer months once the sun goes down. The actual temperature of the coastal surf, even on good days, hovers at 60 degrees, as co-stars Yasmine Bleeth and Gena Lee Nolin (a.k.a. Neely Capshaw) soon discovered – each, suffering from a bout of hypothermia.

NBC’s haste to cancel Baywatch in 1990 was retracted in 1994 when the network took out a full-page ad in Variety, making a public apology to fans for its initial shortsightedness. Nevertheless, when Baywatch returned for its second season, its budget had been streamlined by 30%, forcing production designer, Robert W. Henderson to economize and re-use fully functional buildings as sets. Despite these cutbacks, by 1994, Baywatch was airing in 148 countries around the world, beamed into homes on virtually every continent except Antarctica. Meanwhile, its ever-revolving roster of female talent were being courted by Playboy with Erika Eleniak, Pamela Anderson, Donna D'Errico, Traci Bingham, Carmen Electra, Angelica Bridges, Marliece Andrada, Brande Roderick, and Alicia Rickter eventually committing to ‘spreads’ in Hugh Hefner’s perennially popular skin mag.

Baywatch was always a bit of a hot mess. So, it is rather unsurprising to discover its North American Blu-ray debut – coming almost a full 3 years after everything was remastered and released in Germany on region free Blu-ray – retains that quaint affinity for being more of a gumbo than a souffle. For kick starters, the North American debut on Blu from Fremantle Entertainment is the benefactor of all that considerable effort put forth abroad. And make no mistake here – effort has been paid. Fremantle invested in the insane undertaking, not only to buy up the German remasters of these episodes, derived from original 35mm negatives, but to commit to re-framing the entire series for a widescreen presentation. This means cropping and reformatting virtually every shot to keep everything in its proper perspective. That said, Baywatch was originally shot in traditional 1.33:1 aspect ratio. So, attempting to do an open matte, merely to fill out the sides with additional information is not an option, as camera equipment and crew can be seen in that extra footage. This means every shot had to carefully cropped, zoomed and/or otherwise re-framed. This leads to some oddly situated close-ups throughout the series where heads literally fill the entire image. Curiously, it has also resulted in the use of alternative takes for some scenes – presumably – to better accommodate the widescreen format. Does any of this matter? Yes, though mostly to a Baywatch aficionado and video mastering purist.

As previously mentioned, owing to ASCAP’s utterly insane licensing fees, previous home video releases of Baywatch have been shorn of nearly 350 pop tunes that once augmented its stellar soundtrack. The marketing hype here suggests these songs been ‘re-created’. They’re not. They’re gone – replaced by songs that are a distinct step up from generic muzak but in no way replicate, either in tone or sentiment, the original soundtrack. It’s not a sloppy effort. But it in no way approximates the memory of what once was in its stead. So, one of the show’s chief assets is MIA on Blu too.  ‘I’m Always Here’ has survived this deluge, replacing Peter Cetera’s ‘Save Me’ in Season One for the main titles. All of the main titles have been revamped to conform, not only to this anthem, but new fonts for the titles and iconography, reassembled after Season 3 effectively established the template for the show’s main titles. The most egregious oversight, however, is the foreshortening of several episodes that once featured high-caliber live performances from pop icons of the decade. These have been excised almost entirely as licensing fees for their appearances remain unpaid.  So, certain episodes run well under 40 minutes when the average length for an hour-long show should be between 50-52 minutes. None of this will likely please ‘diehard’ fans of the show. Nor should it, as what’s become of Baywatch is tantamount to watching a classic musical like 1952’s Singin’ in the Rain, minus Gene Kelly’s iconic dance during an impromptu thunderstorm.

The pluses here are all in the video mastering. Truly, Baywatch has never looked better than it does in 1080p. Having gone back to original 35mm elements, and even taken the time to recreate the main titles using a combination of stock footage, and recreated hi-def opticals, Baywatch sports a thoroughly refined image on Blu-ray with eye-popping colors and oodles of fine detail. This one is very impressive, folks. Contrast is exceptional. Interestingly, when Baywatch went into syndication it was shorn of Seasons 1 and 2.  Even more bizarre, when it made the leap to DVD, Season 2 was mis-labeled as Season 1, and Season 2 was actually Season 3 with Season 1 episodes scattered throughout. Mercifully, the entire franchise has been reassembled in its correct chronological order for its transition to Blu-ray. All of the visual effects have been redone – including the extensive blue-screen work during some of the more aggressive action sequences. This results in a cleverer obfuscation of their insertion into the live action stuff as well as much improved color fidelity. All, pluses! Originally, broadcast ‘in stereo, where available’, Baywatch’s remastered soundtrack sounds decades’ younger. Were that it the show’s pop-tune heavy soundtrack had survived to take full advantage of this. There are other issues with the 5.1 audio worth noting. First, it doesn’t appear as though Fremantle had either the rights or even access to original SFX audio stems because certain scenes in which an original score was accompanied by sound effects have now been recorded over with merely a new score and NO sound effects. This is truly an odd executive decision, given how much time and care has been put into the rest of this remastering effort. 

But the most horrendous hack job of the entire series goes to Season 5’s The Runaways in which, apparently, the rights holders of this Blu-ray set and actress/singer, Jayne Leigh Collins could not come to terms on any licensing of her songs. Result: virtually every performance given by Collins in this episode is cut out as well as the grand finale to feature Little Richard. So, an hour-long episode barely covers 30 minutes of runtime here. The most ironic excision, however, is of David Hasselhoff’s concert performances. They’re still here – but Hasselhoff’s voice has been replaced. That’s actually funny! Finally, the fleeting glimpses of nudity in the pilot episode have been excised. Not sure why, other than to make the Blu-rays appeal to a more ‘family friendly’ cohort, although the clan gathered around the tube for a little baywatching was never exactly the show’s core audience. So, go figure. Now, to be fair – Fremantle tried to re-create 350 songs that remain relative to the spirit of the original songs for which they could not get licensing. These efforts are almost seamless when employed in montage. But when the scene involves cast members singing along, the results are pretty laughable as their lips – singing entirely different lyrics than the ones heard on the newly created soundtrack – are haplessly out of sync.

Now, for those who are already insanely outraged by all this tinkering, there is some good news. Due to different copyright laws abroad, the German ‘region free’ Blu-ray releases of Baywatch include all of the pluses mentioned in this review – plus the original soundtrack you remember from television. Yep, that’s right. The original soundtrack is in HD quality. Those Blu-rays are selling like hotcakes too, and for a premium of upwards of $70 per season on Amazon. But if you truly want that ‘almost’ vintage Baywatch viewing experience (remember, even the German Blu’s are in widescreen), they are the only way to go.  Bottom line: Baywatch was always a ridiculously premised dumb show with a lot of boobs and butts flashed in our face. That booty and breast show is still largely intact here. The excisions, changes, replacements, etc. have taken what was already a pretty flawed – though highly enjoyable – escapist puff pastry and really knocked the cream-filled stuffings out of it. Having compared Seasons 1, 2 and 5 from the German import to this ‘complete’ offering from Fremantle only exemplifies just how much meddling has gone on, and how detrimental it is to the overall ‘appreciation’ for Baywatch as it originally aired. Judge and buy accordingly.

FILM RATING (out of 5 – 5 being the best)

Overall series 2.5

VIDEO/AUDIO

4

EXTRAS

0